Monthly Archives: October 2009

I haven’t worked the last 2 days. It’s been kind of rough. I don’t know what to do with my time. I’ve baked everyday that I had off. On Sunday, I baked these pumpkin chocolate chip cookies. They were a little too cakey for my taste. But, the SO and his kids at worked loved it. On Monday, I made brownies from the Hershey’s recipe. One word: DIVINE. On Tuesday, I made carrot cake. I’m not a fan of carrot cake, but the SO loved it. One thing from next time, remember to put more frosting between the layers! I was in this mode for putting the crumb layer on and totally forgot about putting on more frosting! Today, I wanted to make peanut brittle, but I don’t have enough peanuts. Maybe when I head over to the farmer’s market, I’ll stop and get some peanuts.
This not working a lot situation is really bring the morale down. I was getting better with the whole negativity thing. I was used to working about 30 hours a week and now I’m lucky if I get 25. Sad. I feel bad because the SO is basically fronting everything again. I just bake and hope that it makes up for the financial problems. I went running for the first time on Monday. It was kind of not fun. The regimen was: I run for 2 min and walk for 4 min repeat 5 times for a total of 30 min. I’m still hurting, but I’m gonna do it again today. I ran up and down the street. I didn’t wanna run a mile away and realize that I couldn’t run back. That would be embarrassing. The SO may run with me too. Next Friday, in Gainesville,they’re having a woman’s career fair. The SO said I should go and see what it’s like.
He’s amazing. He’s the most understanding and supportive person in the world. I contemplated finding a job ANYWHERE and doing the long distance thing. But, I find that a little too difficult right now because I don’t want to or have a reason to distance myself from him. I just hope that I can find a job in Gainesville and be a true equal partner with him.

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TV all day

I had three days off in a row this week. On Sunday, I went to Plant City for Buddha. Ok, not really for Buddha, but for my mom who is a very strict Buddhist. At first, I was annoyed because I had to wake up early and then pray and meditate all day.
It got better when I came home. I sat down with a glass of Clean Slate Riesling and read up on Bon Appetit and Food and Wine. I got pretty drunk off that half glass. That was probably one of the best nights I’ve had in a long time.
On Monday, I watched a whole bunch of TV. I caught up on my favorite TV shows such as but not limiting it to Glee, Say Yes to the Dress, and Grey’s Anatomy. It was great! The SO came home and we had a quiet night that had us both finish up with reading.
Today, I watched Private Practice because it was on Netflix. I bought some fish for dinner tonight. Baked fish with a carrot recipe that I’m trying out of from F&W is what I’m thinking of making. I also bought a new GRE book to study from. I’ll start studying tomorrow. And, I finally gave up this online game I’ve been playing these past months: Evony. I feel like maybe, just maybe, I’m finally heading in the right direction.

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Hi Hi

It’s been awhile. I always say that. I hope I never say it again and keep up with the blog. So, what’s new? I applied for the UPF internship again. Again, I did not get it. I took the GRE. I bombed it. At first, I was really upset. I was upset because I thought doing well on the GRE would show me the way, the way to a new life. Alas, I picked the wrong thing to show me the way again. I thought it would prove to myself that I can make it through grad school. The tears that I cried for the GRE did not represent the failing of it, but everything else that failed. The failing of the internship, the failing of being able to find another job, the failing of not have a good enough reason to get out of or stay in Gainesville. The tears that I cried were tears of failure. Failings of everything that I have tried or done.

I made apple pie. I burnt the crust.
Sorry, it’s not much of an update. I’ll try again another day.

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