Itchy Feet

I got me some itchy feet.  I mean, I have this feeling of restlessness and and discontent following me around lately.  I don’t know why.  The weather here is perfect and the SO and I are doing very well.  I think what it comes down to is that I need a change of scenery.  My small town life in Gainesville is becoming painfully aware that I do not belong here and need to get out.  I need to stop working in the restaurant industry.  I am tired of being a team player.  I feel like I am always taking one for the team.  Well, when is the team going take one for me?  Never.  I need to stop being so passive aggressive.  I need to be more assertive and motivated to do something with my life.  I took the first step by applying for the teacher certification.  I can only hope I did that part right.

I kind of stopped studying for the GRE because I feel like no one would want me with my grades, so I should gain some life experience before applying.  Ha!  Some life experience I’m getting now.  Seriously, tomorrow I am going to the UF press and just beg and ask for something to do.  I need an excuse to get out of the funk that I am in now.  Sometimes I feel like I bake so I don’t have to worry about what’s going on around me.  I don’t want to deal with not having a real job and my family wondering what I am doing with my life.  I don’t want to deal with the SO giving me the look of “what are you doing with you life?”  I want to be successful, but I feel like I either missed out on the tools that could help or I messed my chances on fixing myself so that it would be easier.  I just wish there was a magical pill where I could just motivate myself to do all the things I want to in my life.

I apologize.  Pity party post now over.

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